The Proper Way to Breath

People ask me all the time: “What is the proper way to breath?”

It is a good question. But impossible to answer. I think you cannot put it that way: right and wrong.

Breath is something we want to become aware of, not control.

Breath is an entry point to go inside of ourselves. An anchor to the moment. It is a link between the unconscious and the conscious mind.  It takes us into the most intimate spaces inside of ourselves. It gives us life.

How could breath be wrong. Breath is a miracle. Breath is a sign of what is going on.

If we start to pay attention to breath it will show us so much about ourselves. We will find tension.  We will find where we close off. Hold.  We will see opportunities to let go.

So should we try to breath deep? You can try. Observe what happens.

Should we sit up or lay down when we practice breath awareness? You can try either. Observe what happens.  

Should we start expanding at the top of the lungs or more from down below? Try. See what happens.

If you do nothing and simply observe breath, it will become your teacher. A way to heal. It will give you access to more room inside yourself.

Some of the ways I instruct people to get in touch with their breath is to lay down and just observe where the breath touches you.  Do you feel it in the nostrils? If you follow it, can you feel the touch of it lower down? Does your abdomen rise and fall?

Another way to play with feeling the breath is to pay attention to it: is it coming in? Or going out? Can you perceive a small pause at the end of the exhalation, or at the end of the inhalation?

If you watch the breath and notice tension in the body, allow the exhale to help you let go of some of it.  I encourage people to permit an audible sigh of release when necessary. Sometimes we are holding so much and it helps to vocalize the letting go; exaggerate the letting go.

A common challenge when we observe our breath is we notice we control the breath. We get self conscious about it. We try to make it even, or steady. We start to impose a rhythm. We try to make it what we think it should be.  If you find you are controlling your breath, one way to easily mess up the control is to crack the mouth open a little. Just for a moment or two. That way, the breath will start to come in and out as it wants. Then you can close the mouth and start to see what is really happening.

I don’t think there is a proper way to breath. But I do think breath awareness is powerful.  Don’t worry too much about how to breath. The key to experience full breath is to get in touch with yourself. The many layers of you.  By observing breath it will take you there.

You will become aware of what is getting in the way of easy, deep breathing. You will find moments where you can let go of that stuff. But first you have to feel it. Acknowledge it. Make room for it. Even make friends with it. Then all that you don’t need to hold inside will dissipate.  In it’s place you will have more room for breath. You will have the space where breath can go.

The best way to develop a breath awareness practice is to take a couple minutes to observe the breath right when you wake up, and/or just before you go to bed. Or if it suits you better at some other time of the day where you can consistently show up for yourself.

It doesn’t have to be a 30 minute session. Even just 5-10 minutes of breath awareness will benefit you in countless ways.  Don’t worry if you are breathing correctly, just witness the breath coming and going.

Expect to get distracted. Thoughts will enter the scene. They will try to make you think instead of feel. Allow them to be there, but don’t get involved. Don’t have a conversation with your thoughts. Watch them like clouds passing in the sky, and then return to the breath.

My favourite analogy when thoughts distract us is like a butterfly fluttering away from the flower. Its okay. It is natural. Then return to the flower to delight in the nectar. Don’t get frustrated. Don’t waste time in judging your ability to stay focused. Just return to the breath when you realize you have become distracted.

In time, the breath becomes such a good friend, we LOVE spending time with it. That is all that is necessary. Don’t think too much about it. Just be with it.